Thursday, May 17, 2012

Firewhiskey on the rocks, please

Get ready for another self-indulgent Harry Potter post!

Expecto Patronum.
I love the words, I love what they mean (“I await a guardian”), I love what the spell does. Because dementors scare the shit out of me. And Harry’s personal experience with learning the spell and the emotional growth he gains from it also strike a chord with me for some reason. So there you have it.

Other spells I like and why:
Accio – So damn useful. Last night I was in the bath and had the door open (if you saw how TINY that bathroom is, and how STEAMY it gets in a matter of minutes, you would understand) and I could see my hair tie sitting on the floor 8 feet away. I started screaming “ACCIO HAIR TIE!” and Eli heard me from the living room, came over, handed me the hair tie with a bemused expression on his face.
I explained that I forgot my wand (I don’t bring it in the bath) and he nodded smilingly, unsurprised. Love that man.

Mosmordre – yes, I know it produces a Dark Mark. But that is pretty groovy when you think about it!! And admit it, the Dark Mark is very  alluring…I think that is why the good guys (A.K.A. The Order of the Phoenix) doesn’t have a “Good Mark” or something to counter the Dark Mark. They know they can’t compete!
And I enjoy the sound of this spell, so thick and forbidding on the tongue. I just know I would get in trouble at Hogwarts for using this one in the corridors between classes. Say it. Don’t you just feel badass now??


This is a tough one. Lots of times when I am reading the books, particularly those earlier in the series, I will start to salivate. Rowling’s descriptions of the feasts…good God! Can you say most-delicious-things-ever?! Fried sausages, stew, jacket potatoes, roast chicken, roast beef, Cornish pasties, and pumpkin juice! And those breakfasts…How are Hogwarts students not fatly rolling down the halls?
Clotted cream and treacle tart sound too good to be true, and to me they are because I have never tasted them, let alone seen them in real life!
I gravitate the most to pumpkin pasties (I adore pumpkin anything) and sugar quills (I am always chewing on the ends of pens). And sign me up for butterbeer and firewhiskey!!! And what in the hell is a gillywater?

 Damn, I’m hungry. You’ve done it again, J.K.!

Floo Powder just doesn’t appeal to me, I despise the very idea of the Knight Bus, and I’m not quite sure how well I’d fare on a broom. And I love trains, so….somewhat lamely (and non-magically), I’d have to say the Hogwarts Express. I am kind of a nerd about trains…I actually went to the historical train museum in Minnesota and I love looking at model trains, riding on trains (though Europe is the only place you can decently do it) and long for the day when I have a train to run in a ring under my Christmas tree.
Plus the Hogwarts Express is a long journey where you get to catch up with friends you haven’t seen all summer, and there is the fat witch rolling around the trolley with delicious treats on it, and it is usually raining outside (which makes it extra cozy to be sitting in, looking out). That sounds like my kind of a good time! Get some elderflower wine, a deck of cards, a good book and some killer friends, and that is a real party train!


Defense Against the Dark Arts!!! #1. Easy.
I would say History of Magic, if Professor Binns weren’t such a snoozefest.
My secondaries  would be Transfiguration and Charms, because they are both challenging but rewarding. And Charms just sounds so perky, especially with Flitwick at the helm. And they are both so useful in daily life!
I like the idea of Divination, though not under that crackpot Trelawney (I would probably get fed up and walk out, like Hermione), and Herbology, though I shudder to think at some of the plants they deal with.
Like Harry, I expect I would completely suck at potions (anyone who has tasted my cocktails can vouch for this. Deadly.).


Wands are the best. And Time-Turners,  the Marauder’s Map, Lunascopes. And the nose-biting teacups are hysterical.


The Hand of Glory. The Veil that Sirius falls through. Howlers.

Now I'm off for a snack. All that talk of Cornish pasties and stews and sugary treats has made me hungry!

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